Maybe

My identity is ready to be influenced by the past,
And Maybe my past lives...

Body

My cunt feels like something has been cut off...

I See.

I keep seeing buckets of blood.
I't must be close to "time of death".
A reminder of her...
The beautiful one,
Who's life could only go that way...
Dead at 48.
Teiwaz

Close

Im human and I want to be close to someone...don't want a relationship...but just to hug, hold, kiss someone would make me fell fucking great...fuck this love shit. It all hurts in and out of love...soooo many feelings all at once aarrrrgggghhhh....But I have my eye on someone I would like to get to know...but I've made it that she contacts me...what a head fuck life can be!
Teiwaz
P.S photos not edited...the rawness of it all

Its been a while...

I haven't written for a while as I was feeling so much fear about putting myself out there...The fear is around my own criticism of myself...Who cares what I write or don't write...I know I have to heal my deep wounds and, sorry to say, they go very deep. I need to forgive myself, my responsibility is (_) that big but others who have abused me and taken my life away, made it hard for me to be in the world are responsible for this much________________________________________________________________________________!
I had a reading done today and she said "I need to not be so hard on myself as I live in the negative"..."once i cut the ties that are like tentacles...I will find who i am and what i want...i was told i will know when i am ready, to use the camera to see what others don't see, to use the camera for what i see and feel...Abstract...
So i will come to this place when it suits me and write what the hell i want to write, use my own language and my own photos and other art forms...it's all me...Teiwaz